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Kindness Begins With Us

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What if the kindest thing you do today is the smallest? We dig into the everyday choices that shape character, from helping before filming to practicing humility when arrogance feels easier. Our focus is practical: how to rebuild empathy, strengthen values, and turn personal setbacks into fuel for growth that spreads beyond you.

We unpack the difference between being nice and being kind, and why boundaries are part of real compassion. You’ll hear why success is relative and self-defined, how faith and effort meet in action, and why the process matters more than polished outcomes. We tackle desensitization, the herd mentality, and the social media vortex that rewards spectacle over service. Then we go tactical: simple habits that harden into character, strategies to hone your uniqueness, and a mindset that treats “failure” as data. If Edison logged 1,000 ways that didn’t work, what would happen if you did the same with your goals?

We also explore innovative volunteerism: using what you have, where you are, to solve what you see. Think of it as a values-first approach to community impact, whether you’re mentoring, building tools that cut waste, or simply choosing to show up with integrity. Discipline ties it all together. Tools are neutral; character is not. When we align conviction with consistent effort, we elevate our lives and the people around us.

Ready to trade shortcuts for the stairs and performance for purpose? Hit play, share this with someone who needs a mindset reset, and leave a review with the one habit you’ll start building this week.

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Thank you for listening to Conversations That Inspire with Dr. Richard Munang and Danielle Afumbom Munang.

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SPEAKER_01:

Hello everyone. Welcome to the mindset spot with my host Afu. Wat says you.

SPEAKER_00:

Well, thank you guys for tuning in to the Mindset Spot. It is a pleasure to have you join today. And in this episode, we will be talking about it Starts With Us and how we can leverage our skills to turn challenges into solutions for personal growth and also socioeconomic growth.

SPEAKER_01:

I like that challenges for personal growth. But let's face it, the reality is that a child takes nine months in the womb. Then when that child is given birth, the first option is to cry. Then the environment starts to shape him or her, and then they start to pick up around things. Do you then think that the environment in which people are growing up today is making them worse or better?

SPEAKER_00:

Well, I think that comes down to the very heated debate on nature versus nurture. However, just in simple terms, I think that it's definitely a variety of factors that influence a person's character and demeanor. And it's very important to note that within an environment that you are in, there are definitely strategies that one could take to follow the right path and to stick to your values.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah, but the point is that a lot of people, let's say, for example, before you look at how people behave each and in every sphere of life, there's arrogance. People are rude. Where do they learn these things?

SPEAKER_00:

That's a good question. I think that it comes from a variety of, for example, what people may see on the media or what people may see within interaction between others. And those things, especially at a younger age, it's easy to pick up. And what we must be able to do is to be able to discern and understand our conviction in life and use our conviction in a positive manner so that the things that we are picking up from others are things that align with our values and convictions. For example, let's say your conviction is to intersect law and justice, picking up qualities, for example, being compassionate, being a good listener are all things that could positively impact you within your conviction. So finding your passion and finding the qualities that align with that are what should be picked up rather than the negative negativity we see constantly being picked up.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah, the point is that sometimes we look at the world as it is today, and we see people and we ask the question why are people so unkind? Why do they lack empathy? But the truth is that kindness is cultivated. Nobody is born with it. And so, with the challenges that the world is facing today, people have been laid off from schools because fee cannot be afforded. People go to bed without food because there is no money to buy food. Others are suffering through personal issues, but yet this is happening in a world in which we need to face it very clearly that our childhood shapes who become. So, with where we are today, do you think that we can be able to reverse this current trend? Because young people and old people, sometimes you look at it, you notice that we are losing empathy. And if we lose empathy, then definitely the world might not go down a path that everybody will like to see the demonstration of different attitudes that will emerge from that lack of empathy. What do you say?

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah, I think that the lack of empathy is something that really needs to be spoken about because we're especially seeing it with desensitization. For example, if an incident happens in society, the odds are that somebody will start recording rather than going to help out. And that is something that is unfortunately the stark reality that we see today. And we must be able to cultivate empathy, like you said, from a young age, but that doesn't mean that if it was not cultivated earlier, that doesn't mean that you're immune from empathy. And what we must be able to do is understand where our strengths and weaknesses lie and try to turn our weaknesses and grow within our weaknesses so that we can be able to cultivate the skills that are important to thrive and be compassionate members of society.

SPEAKER_01:

Very, very important point. And I like the fact that you've touched especially with recording situations rather than coming in to solve the problem that the grandmother slips and falls to the ground. People are recording to puts on Facebook on more so on TikTok. Why? For views and friends. Does it mean it looks like our morals are becoming somehow denigrated? And if that is the case, for how long can we sustain this?

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah, I think that it's not sustainable because the foundation of every community is harmony. And for us to be harmonious, we must be able to care for each other. And there is a popular African saying that it takes a village, and it truly does take a village, and that village cannot be cultivated if we are truly individualistic. And for example, I think I like the example you said of a grandmother falls down because my one of my friends was at an event and someone fell down. And instead of calling emergency services, people started recording. And that's unfortunate that's unfortunate. That's the unfortunate reality of today. And for us to develop these skills and to develop that kindness, we must be able to introspect and find out what makes us unique and what has cultivated us into the person we are today and pay it forward.

SPEAKER_01:

And and and let me just uh follow up again on that aspect, right? The dot-com generation calling themselves the Gen Z and Gen Alphas that are emerging as such that we are in a different era. That is understandable. And in every succeeding generation, there's always been emergence of people who think differently and do things differently. But what never changed are the fundamentals, and fundamentals here are values, values of respect, values of kindness, values of empathy, values of just being appreciative and not manipulative. But when you look at the generation today, what one word, in one word, what aspect stands out that everybody seems to go with it without even interrogating what it means? But the consequences are there.

SPEAKER_00:

I think within not really a word but a phrase, I think it's a herd mentality and just following what is the status quo. And what we must do is shift away in the status quo and seek righteousness and be able to discern what is good and what is not good so that we can be able to shift away from that status quo and move towards doing the right thing. And to segue into that, we have a question from Orwa Jr. And he says, What is the difference between being kind and being nice? So if you would like to take that to answer, we would greatly appreciate it.

SPEAKER_01:

The one aspect that seems to be losing its value and degenerating into somehow an aspect that many look at it as if it is something which they benefit at the moment is arrogance. I think people feel important in arrogance, not understanding the danger of it. And that is the point in which we're going to focus on now, the cause of arrogance, where in the moment feeling important and disrespecting and sounding big costs you more than you gain. And the attitude that comes from arrogance arrogance is usually cultivated around importance, but importance not of anything that is done, but importance of individual feeling to be respected, not because of something that has been done, but just because of how they feel they should be. Do you think this is a conqueror?

SPEAKER_00:

Uh please repeat that. Repeat your final statement. Yeah, I think that before we get into that, just to answer Orway Junior's question of the difference between being kind and nice, based on my understanding, I think that being nice is equivalent to being polite, like having manners. When somebody opens the door, you say thank you, and overall being a de a decent individual. But then being kind is truly the value of community. For example, going beyond and really going from the bottom of your heart, not because it's something that you've been taught to do, but some something that you've been convicted to do. And that kindness goes beyond just the simple manners of society, it goes beyond that, and it's implemented in whatever facade you're in, in whatever face of life that you happen to be in.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah, there's a question here.

SPEAKER_00:

Back to the question of arrogance now. I think that arrogance is formed through, like you said, the feeling and the bubble of an individual and the importance that they may feel that they must exert. And it's very unfortunate because although, yes, it's important to have confidence, but we must not use that confidence to bring other people down and to use it as a way not to learn from others. And we must shift that arrogance to being willing to learn, humility, and all those values that you you never know what you may learn from someone. And by honing in on those values of humility and determination rather than arrogance, you can learn more and you can achieve more together.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah, we are living in a world in which people feel important because we cannot ignore this part. What makes people feel important, and in that importance, there is really nothing attributed to it because that is the cause of this the aspect you mentioned earlier lack of empathy. A grandmother sleeps and and and falls wherever it is, on the floor, on the street, instead of young people, old people alike hoping to get her up, they're videotaping her for TikTok reels, you know, for Facebook reels or Instagram reels or TikTok videos. Where has our moral gone to? And they do that because they want to feel important and they want to broadcast news earlier. And like I said before, and I think it's a very important aspect. I said our childhood shapes who we became. So if a child grows up hearing empathy, he or she was going to grow up having that empathy in him or her. If they grow up seeing selfishness, they would believe that that's how life is. If they grew up around kindness, around people who serve without expecting anything back, then kindness became their language. No one is born rude, no one is born arrogant, no one is born. These things are learned, copied, repeated. So that getting that to the core of it, which you mentioned, some of these things. So if we want a generation that is kind, selfless, compassionate, and empathetic, it must start with us right now and right here. So, how do we start it? Especially with the young people, and they all alike because old people are also very arrogant today. Young people are also very arrogant and disrespectful. So, how do we bridge this? So, a young person listening from Burkina Faso or from Sierra Leone or Cameroon or uh Kenya or Tanzania or Zambia or uh Morocco or Togo, what would you say they need to do to change these behaviors? Because they don't add up, right?

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah, 100%. And I think that like the title of this podcast is it truly starts with us. And once the first step is recognition, once we recognize where our strengths and weaknesses lie and what we need to improve on, then we can start having a proactive approach. For example, let's say you struggle with manners or not being as nice as possible. Maybe you can make it a goal whenever I'm gonna hold the door for someone, say thank you. Little steps like that, small attainable steps so that it becomes habit, and from there, then you can amplify the the values that shape society in a positive way.

SPEAKER_01:

Right. Before we continue, let's uh answer this from Jinho. He said, What is the difference between being kind and being nice?

SPEAKER_00:

We already answered that, and just to reiterate, I think that, like I said previously, being nice is something that is generally regarding manners, and being kind is that conviction to show humility, show respect in every place that you go to. While being nice is very reactive at some point the door, you say thank you, but being kind is a more proactive approach.

SPEAKER_01:

Excellent. I think just to add to that, the reality is that the first person to be kind to is yourself. You can't be kind to others when you have not cultivated it internally. And nicen is an offshot of kindness. You can't pretend you are nice when you are not kind to yourself. So what humans exhort outside is what is inside, and pretense will only be short-term and short-lived. So a kind human being will first be kind to his or herself, then exude that kindness to others. Niceness is an offshot of kindness because those who are nice and not kind, it's just a matter of time. You will notice that that niceness was a manipulative way to then get what they didn't have. Niceness is not naivety. You get what I'm trying to say. You, if you are kind to yourself, you cannot sacrifice yourself to please others. If you have$50 you've not eaten, you can still buy food and share with everybody, but you eat in the course of also sharing, right? But you can't die of hunger because you think that you are going to please other people. That to me is not kindness to yourself. And then you want to show that you are nice, that's naivety. And therefore, we need to be very realistic and practical. It's not in showing how nice we are that we forget ourselves, it is in making sure that we don't forget ourselves so that we can be better off and that kindness can flow naturally. And that is a very fundamental principle that I think is important to be demarcated. I think Joseph said homes are the most important institutions for shaping character. There is a saying where I come from the one who is not taught at home will be taught by the world. What's it you are for?

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah, that's a very common saying, and I think that it's especially important because a lot of the time what I find is that the things that I've learned at home, they're very related and they're very applicable in real world settings. For example, let's say you're taught resilience, you have to do it. Even if you fall down a hundred times, you have to get up. That's important. And you see the parallels in real life. Let's say a test didn't go the way you wanted it to, a quiz didn't go the way it wanted you wanted to. Your mark in the class is not the way you want it to be. You can't just give up. You have to keep on persevering till you achieve that goal. And a lot of the time, if you don't hear it at home, the first time you'll get that reality check will be in the real world, where the consequences may not be you getting grounded. It may you may be you getting the job, not getting the job you want, or not getting into the school you want. So it's very important to have strong pillars. And if you don't have those strong pillars, seek mentorship and be willing to learn because not everybody has the same opportunities, but we must be able to make use and make the best out of our situations. And Joseph Robbie also says, excellently put doctor, a kind human automatically exudes niceness, and niceness is not naivety.

SPEAKER_01:

Excellent, and that's a very important point. Niceness is not naivety. And thank all of you. Please keep the comments coming and suggestions. And if you're just tuning in, this is the mindset spot where we discuss how to reset the mind so that we can have a renewal in our thinking so we can turn challenges into opportunities. Afu, nah, to the point, faith without works is dead. James 2 26. What says you people want miracles to fall from heaven without effort? Is that right?

SPEAKER_00:

Uh yes, and I think that this is the point that you brought up, faith without works is dead. It's a quote that spans beyond religion and it's incorporated in everyday life, no matter what you believe in. And like I always say, you can't start a car without fuel, like whether it's electric, gasoline, diesel, it won't, it's simply it will not work. It's not possible. And that parallels real life. You cannot study, you cannot not study and expect an 100% and be upset when you don't get 100% if you didn't study. And the same thing, you cannot not prepare for a job interview. And when you're confused about the questions and don't know what's going on, then blame it on everyone else but yourself. We must be able to be proactive and put in the work to be able to see results. And I think, especially with the rise of social media and the results-driven society without seeing the process, it has enabled a lot of people to think that results just come down from the sky when that is not in fact the case. What we must do is shift from that society of not sharing the process and being more open and transparent about the process so that others and youth can realize that things do not just happen. There must be a process, there must be steps, and success comes by taking the stairs, not by the elevator.

SPEAKER_01:

I like that. Success comes by taking the stairs, not the elevator. If you take the elevator without having practiced how to climb the stairs, when the elevator collapses, definitely you might not be able even to land because you haven't practiced that. That's a very good way to put it, and that means that we all have blessings. And if we all have blessings, without effort, it is like seeds that we've we have, but we haven't planted it, then we expect the harvest. Is that so? And if that is the case, then we should also know that we have miracles. Those miracles are with us, but we need to operationalize it through work. The light bulb episode. Tell me about it if you understand it. If not, then I will kick in and use that example. So it takes us to the next aspect, which is the power of effort.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah, 100%. And the light bulb example is just one out of plenty of examples of the impact of resilience. Thomas Edison, who created the light bulb, he failed countless times. And when he finally developed the solution, which is the reason why we're able to have this episode today through the light bulb, he said that all the times he failed, that was not a failure. It was just figuring out and learning a way something is not done. And by shifting our mindset, by thinking of things as ways to improve rather than definitive failures, we too can empower ourselves to thrive and to achieve our goals. And before we move on to the next segment, we have another comment from Joseph Robbie. And he says, This is the most important topic. We always hear that institutions are the corner of transformation. However, right-thinking humans focused on service and not the survival are the cornerstones of affected institutions. This discussion takes us to the core of the matter: renewing mindsets. That is absolutely correct. And as we transition into the segment of renewing mindsets, we would love to hear from you guys. Keep on commenting, keep on asking questions because this discussion would not be possible without your support. So thank you for tuning in and keep on with the engagement.

SPEAKER_01:

Indeed, Afu, beautifully said. And just on the light bulb aspect, that was a very important way to simplify and amplify that when he was asked, Thomas Edison, who fell 1000 times, as Afu have said, when he was asked how he fell, he said, I didn't fail 1000 times. I learned 1000 ways and it didn't work. That is effort, that is mindset, and that is discipline that we all need to die. Do you think that young people and old people are doing enough? They give up, like you said, they don't prepare for an exam, then they fail, or they the the the the the prepare for something and then it doesn't happen and then they give up. Do you think that this is something that is not taught enough? And even the biblical aspects are not utilized enough to put a lot of effort on those who might not know that giving up is actually a weakness.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah, and I think that it spans beyond religion because not everybody uses the Bible, but it's a core principle that is the foundation of success. And like Joseph Robbie says in his comment, it's like hiding seeds in the cupboard and expecting a harvest. That simply does not happen. And across generations, I think social media and the perception of success is something that a lot of people have fallen. I like that. And success is not linear. I always say, but it truly is not linear. And what may be success for you may not be success for someone else. So we must focus and stay within our own lanes so that we can put in effort. And if someone else doesn't have to put as much effort as you do, that's not your responsibility. That's not your business. And you should not try to emulate someone else's recipe as it will not turn out the same. You must introspect and figure out what makes you unique and hone in on your recipes to success. And then from there, through that effort, you will be able to cultivate something that you'll be proud of.

SPEAKER_01:

Amazing. Read what uh Jose have said.

SPEAKER_00:

Yes. So piggybacking on what said previously, he says, faith without work, brilliant, Doctor and Danielle. It's like hiding seeds in the cupboard and expecting a harvest. Effort is irreplaceable. It truly is irreplaceable. And if you don't have to work for something today, you will have to work for something tomorrow. And those habits that you develop by working hard, finding out the end goal, perseverance, determination, even though you may not need it now, there will be a time where you'll have to work for something. And from there, you'll have the skills to make you competitive in whatever you're trying to achieve.

SPEAKER_01:

Right. And what is Peter saying?

SPEAKER_00:

Peter says success is not linear. That is the key word. And I'd like to really hone in on this because a lot of the time we see with social media or comparison, we see that there is an idea of success, an objective idea. And success cannot be quantified. Success also cannot be generalized. It comes down to the individual. And each individual is not the same. If we look at our fingers, not all five of our fingers are the same length, right? So we extra we need to extrapolate this. Not all of our journeys are going to be the same. And for us to succeed, we must find out what we are passionate about and where we want to go and take the proactive steps to get there. And where I want to go may not be the same place that someone else wants to go, but we must have our unique pathways and our individualized pathways so that we can use what's available to us to be able to reach our goals.

SPEAKER_01:

I like that. Very beautifully said and very eloquently articulated. And now that takes me to the point that I think we need to emphasize more. And I will use biblical quotes today intentionally, so that a message can be anchored on wisdom as well as aspects that all of us need to uh leverage. In Ecclesiastics chapter 9, verse 10, it is said that whatever your hand finds to do, do it with all your might. If we keep waiting for others to fix us, we will be we will keep waiting until grass grows on our feet. So it means that we have to be able to put in the effort as you've rightly said. But I want to revert back to the work that you mentioned, uniqueness. Do you think that people underestimate their uniqueness and try and focus more on copying others that they forget what they have? Like they say in Nigeria, there is a proverb that you put something in your shokoto and you go to look it in Sokoto, and Sokoto is the further state. So Shokoto is your pocket. You put something in your pocket and you're going to look it elsewhere. Do you think we are at that stage? Most of us now, which is something that needs to be reversed.

SPEAKER_00:

100%. And when you're actually explaining that, I was thinking about the same quote as well. And I think it's a powerful exemplary of the fact that we must find out what makes us unique. Everybody has something that sets them apart. And a lot of the time we say, oh, when I get to this stage, I'll start trying. When this thing gets hard, then I'll start trying. But like the quote you mentioned, we must build those habits and we must put in full effort to each and everything we do so that when it does not go the way we expect, we know that I did what I can do and that was out of my control. And for us to truly understand our uniqueness, we must stop comparing. We must truly introspect and find out what are we made of and what is our calling. And that calling may be different for each and every person. And that calling doesn't mean that that's the only thing you focus on in life. That just means that you try to implement it and weave it to make you stand out. For example, let's say you're gifted at public speaking, you may be in a job that doesn't require public speaking, but the day that they have an event, you must avail yourself in a way that people know that you're the person to go to. Or let's say you're focused on fashion, you may be in a job that doesn't require fashion. But let's say people know you as the person who has the most unique and creative style. So by trying to implement your uniqueness and trying to find out your conviction and implement it, then you'll be able to truly succeed and to set yourself apart in this world where homogeneity seems to be the status quo.

SPEAKER_01:

Right. And do you think the lack of understanding the uniqueness? Because unique uniqueness is not actually an inheritance, uniqueness is horn. And when you hone, it becomes a skill. A dancer practices, a singer practices, a hairdresser practices, a speaker practices, and all this wired across all of them is one word, effort. And effort is the opposite of ease. Ease is the biggest threat to progress. But yet we've been conditioned to think that we can wait and things happen without us putting effort. That's a big lie that was ever sold. And because that lie was sold, it's continuously perpetuated to make a lot of people think that you can get what you've not worked for. That's manipulation and that's stiffery, so to speak. Because of that, I want now to move to the next aspect, which is still on uniqueness, that the sum total of everyone bring this some total of different attributes and talents. But yet the copy card mentality of leaving what you have in your pocket to go and look it elsewhere has costed us more. And that is the biggest currency. Now, my question is which is more a comment that I think you can react on. Are we being told what we need not to do as compared to what we need to do?

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah, and I think that the point you mentioned leading up to this statement is something that's truly inspiring, that your uniqueness is honed and it takes effort because anyone can realize what makes them unique. But to truly stand out, we must be able to hone that and to develop our passions and skills. And to answer your question or to build off on your statement, I think that the perception is of success, like I mentioned previously, is something that's inhibiting a lot of people's personal growth. Because people may feel that their talent or their unique abilities or their aptitudes is not equivalent to the status quo or what it should be. And based on, I've had plenty of conversation with plenty of people. And the main thing that people look for within a group of people is not for every group to be the same. It's for that individuality to shine through. And we must be able to cultivate that individuality. And I find the unfortunate reality is that sometimes it feels that that individuality. Is being hidden underneath the perception of success. That to be successful, you must work an ex job, go to X school, do X things, wear X clothes. When in reality, we must be able to do what works for us. And from there, we can be able to be the creators of our success in our own journey, which may not look the same as the status quo. And that's perfectly okay.

SPEAKER_01:

And that's perfectly okay. And just to add to those brilliant points, success is relative. As you said, person helping a mother to have pools to dry her vegetables like a solar dryer, if that mother can reduce that wastage that was happening because of lack of that solar dryer, and a young person develops that that's success for both the mother and the young person. If someone can be able to pick up a grandmother who sleeps, fell on the ground, and people instead of holding her up, were taking selfies so that they can have TikTok videos to show how important it is to laugh at people who have fallen down at every age, as compared to the one who comes and lift him or her up, that's success. So success is relative, but the most important aspect you mentioned is that success is self-determined and is self-engineered. And I think what that means in simple terms is that you have to first succeed in your mind before you can succeed in the physical. Because let me just take two minutes and explain this. Everything in the world happens in the spiritual realm, and spirituality is imagination. And imagining it's already where things happen. If you imagine you will succeed, the energy to prepare will come automatically. You because in your mind you are already on a pathway to success, and you know that you have to be on top of it again. If you have already said, I will, I, I, I have lost this, then the negative energy and low levels, because negative energy is always at low levels, positive energy is always at high levels and high frequency. Frequency is actually what happens frequently, very quickly, very quickly. And the faster it happens, it's higher, and that is high frequency. So, why am I bringing this up? The determination of success happens first in the individual self before it gets unleashed. And in that pathway of success, there will be obstacles. There will be obstacles, treacherous crocodiles infiltrating everywhere. But one thing that we should always know is that a passionate, focused, determined person cannot be stopped by anybody because the energy levels don't match. And with a high energy level, your ability to think and navigate and focus can never match the lower energy level because they will need to work so many times to catch up with you. And that's why I always tell young people when you are focused and determined, then nobody can stop you. But it has to start in your mind by first accepting that I have to work towards this and I need to be the best. So the first word you must mention always, I will I am the best. You don't need to say I will be the best. No, I am the best. Then you benchmark with the best and work towards it. That was a very good point that I just thought I should throw some light. Now let's read comments.

SPEAKER_00:

Yes, so we have a comment, Joseph Robbie. Thank you so much for participating. And it says, Perception of success. Wonderful. Such discussion brings people to the reality of success. It's not about admiring it from the outside, it's rather about objectively participating, putting the best foot forward in whatever one sets out to do. Amazing, amazing, amazing.

SPEAKER_01:

Right. Then Elizabeth.

SPEAKER_00:

Elizabeth, thank you so much for the comments and um for the encouragement. And before we move on to the next comment, I just wanted to say regarding your point on frequency, it just brought me back to a saying that I always hear an African saying, you can't stop a moving train. Once you're on your grind, for lack of better wording, once you are truly locked in or dialed in once you truly have that energy and that passion and that conviction to succeed, no one can stop it. Like, will there be setbacks along the way? 100%. But just having that ability to keep on pushing and you just keep you don't feel defeated by whatever setbacks may come, but turn it into a lesson to focus and to bring your a game the next time. That is truly something that nobody can take away from you once you discover it. Absolutely. Our next question from Za Peter we have how do we know we're on the right track, especially when the journey is becoming extremely challenging. Dr. Mening, I know you had a point, so mention the point and then get into the question. Thank you very much.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah, a very important question. And Peter, it's my mentee from Ghana, amazing guy, doing good work and very passionate. The point is this challenges become more when you are closer to getting what is destined for you. And that's what we are not told, right? We are taught is rather than effort. And effort doesn't mean that you're not going to face challenge because the reality is that there is nothing called challenge, it's just a disguised opportunity. And I can assure you from a perspective which I know you because I mentor you, if you make an application, let's say for a scholarship, and you don't get it, that actually is an opportunity for you to think through more what might have been the issue and retell it differently. And in the course of doing that, you might actually notice that you are refining your interest even much better. That gives you an opportunity. Number two is that it's usually said that God sometimes blocks some doors, not because you could not have entered into them, because if you entered into them, they would have been more treasurous and dangerous for you. So every disappointment is a disguised opportunity, it's a blessing in disguise. And so if you look at it from that perspective, without giving up, because giving up is where now the equation changes, you will notice that actually you've lost nothing, you've actually gained because you gained experience in applying. And the fact that you didn't get it, then to use Thomas Edison that fell 1000 times in producing the light bulb. And when he was asked the question, he said no, he only learned 1000 times. So there's nothing he would have said, I have had so many challenges. Are you seeing the perspective? See, so it's only one word perspective, negative perspective or positive perspective, positive opportunity, negative challenges. So focus on the positive, which is opportunity, and that's perspective, and therefore, knowing that you are on the right path is when you are facing challenges because it means you are doing something. If you are not facing any challenges, then you are not doing anything, and somebody may be doing it for you, but that person will definitely get out, and you will never have the experience to do it like that person, and that is how so. Life is about perspective, and if you look at life from a perspective of nothing is impossible, because even in the word impossible, I am possible is there. Let me repeat it again: nothing is impossible because even in the word impossible, I am possible is there, therefore, nothing like a challenge, just lessons learned. Perfect.

SPEAKER_00:

Awesome, awesome. And before we move on to the next, I I wanted to state that, yeah, like everybody has face setbacks, but you must turn your perspective. For example, in my scenario, there was a program I really wanted to do, like within my school, I didn't get in, right? And I was like, everyone else got in, I didn't get in. Like, why, like, why, like, what, why didn't I get in? But the program I ended up doing provided me with opportunities that are now helping me today and really and helped me find my passion and what I want to pursue later on. And without my setback and without that rejection letter, I wouldn't have found out what I truly wanted to become and get opportunity that are now helping me today to mentor young people within the community. And Joseph Robbie says before we moved on to that, he said the thing will you define for Sokoto Day for your Sokoto. And he also says, uniqueness is honed and takes effort. Amazing doctor.

SPEAKER_01:

Excellent. Uniqueness is honed indeed, Robbie.

SPEAKER_00:

Uh here says, brilliant submission from Danielle. Thank you very much. And all these contributions, our passion, our energy would not have been possible without you guys being active contributors. So thank you so much. And we appreciate the kind words from Janet Chase as well, where they say, do it with all your might. What makes us unique? What make what is our purpose? You are both so empowering to us. We appreciate the kind words, and thank you for your support and encouragement as well.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah, and the purpose of life is to be useful. Anything that you do that help beyond you and others, is the essence of why we live. So, purpose is doing that, that gets you up in the morning with or without any support from anybody, but you still want to do it because it will solve a problem and take you forward on others, is quite very, very important. And the reality is that if you look at it very critically, just to add to value to that aspect of uniqueness, is that what is so important that I think is not even discussed more, even in school, it should become part of curriculum. Is that the the way human beings are made, they focus on what they offer and can offer, and nurturing that path not actually taking central stage. Imagine a whole choir that have drums, that have pianos, that have different notes, and have those who are singing uh bass, those who are singing the first verse, the second verse, they they have different names, but it all coalizes to produce unified, excellent, beautiful music. That's how human beings are. So the sum total of efforts and talents and abilities and unique qualities produces excellent solutions to the problems that we face today, and that is really, I just thought I should touch on that because I thought it was a very important aspect. I think the rest are oh, there are a lot here. I think still chess Janet says that Robbie says something, embodied knowledge, global treasure. God bless you both for archiving here for now and for prosperity. Thank you, Robbie. Thank you. Janet says Afu read.

SPEAKER_00:

Um, they say everything you both are saying is so true. Wow, very empowering. Thank you.

SPEAKER_01:

And um, Peter.

SPEAKER_00:

Peter says that's very deep and enlightening. Thank you, prof.

SPEAKER_01:

Excellent, amazing. Yes, Afu, you were to we were to move to the next aspect, which is we have 20 minutes to go on top to the top of the hour. And I want us now to look back at the aspect we always touch social media, social media, social media.

SPEAKER_00:

It's not a mindset for episode if we don't talk about social media.

SPEAKER_01:

Yes, is it breaking or making?

SPEAKER_00:

I think that that's a very interesting point because I think it just truly depends on where you're scrolling, because the things that get the most views, those aren't the things that are gonna benefit you most of the time, right? And the things that are trending aren't the things that are gonna tell you that success is unique. And they're going to tell you what you want to hear rather than what you need to hear. And because when you think about it, this is social media. The mindset spot is going to be aired on Apple Music, Spotify, Facebook, everywhere. So the people who are listening to this, this is social media. But social media also consists of things that are discouraging young individuals on how to succeed and are discouraging individuals who want to go against the status quo and to form their own paths and journeys. So I think that social media, it's a tool, and if the tool is used for good, then people can gain that valuable insights. However, if we see that the tool is being used for things, then people will gravitate to the things that are most trending, which most often tend to be the things that are misguiding the young people and are shifting the narrative of success.

SPEAKER_01:

Exactly. And I think the the point is this every time every generation emerges, there is always something new and unique in every succeeding generation. If you look at the time of the development of the locomotive engine, that was something unique to aeroplanes, to developing ultrasound, to laser beams, and discovery of different things that I've ever had to medicine throughout history. What has always made the difference is not the tools, it's the people. It's because of lack of one word discipline. Imagine a grandmother sleep instead of rushing to lift her up, you are videotaping her to be the first person to post it on TikTok. That's where morals have disappeared. Take the same person and put it in a government office or in a private firm or in a business. What will happen? So the point I'm trying to say, the individuals on their own are not a problem, but attitude dimensions can be reversed to make human beings exceptionally unique, as you said, and unleash their best because we sometimes because to pick up somebody who has slipped down is simple and it's empathy, right? And if you can do it, you can do it everywhere. Imagine everybody lifting one another up. How nice will the world be? So the point I'm trying to make is that the utilization of social media wrongly is not because of social media as a tool, it's because of lack of the values that we are supposed to utilize empathy, kindness, right, love, and more importantly, discipline in the process of utilizing it. So it's like drinking. If you can take one beer and another person can take 20 beers, who is more disciplined in the name of I don't need filler for my head, and then another one takes chai. Yeah, so so the the the point I'm trying to make here is that social media as a tool is not a problem, but the utilization of it is actually irresponsible, unaccountable, but it's the best tool that can make or break in terms of advancing development. Imagine a young person with 30,000 followers who uses that space to engage other people and teach them with new knowledge like we're doing today. You transform a society without having to have gone to K to to Kenya or to Cameroon or to Ghana or to Surreal, but you can be able to reach someone like our amazing brothers and sisters here who are contributing here, they are in different spaces, but yet we are in one place. So the good of social media are weighs the part of social media, but the part of social media can collapse the world, paradoxical, but that's it.

SPEAKER_00:

I think there are a lot of um inputs here, like the one farm with the farm with Kunguru says, and as today's topic says, most of us are okay. So Aura Jr. says, I love the discussion, and then farm with Kunguru says, and as today's topic says, most of us we are suffering due to how we were raised, and I realized it and accepted to change.

SPEAKER_01:

Absolutely.

SPEAKER_00:

Introspection is very important, and we're glad that you introspected and are utilizing the mindset spot to make that change. And Joseph Robbie says, The purpose of life is to be useful, timeless, doctor. This statement should be the premise of what is taught in every social institution that convenes human humanity, homes, churches, schools, etc. This is how we get renewal that is paramount for progress.

SPEAKER_01:

Amazing, amazing stuff.

SPEAKER_00:

And Janet Chase says, Amen. Thank you very much.

SPEAKER_01:

That is very, very amazing and wonderful. And since she said amen, let now let me bring up the last biblical verse for us to conclude, which is that let us not become wary in doing good, for at a proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. Do you think that giving up is costing us a lot?

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah, 100%. And before we move on to the essence and the perils of giving up, we must discuss and elaborate on your point about social media and how it comes down to the individual. And that's the same thing that it's unfortunate because you see a lot of individuals saying that, oh, when I get to this stage, I'll do XYZ. Like we've seen how a lot of people who want to leave their countries are saying, when I go to this particular country, then I will start to be ambitious, or then I'll start to implement goals. And it comes down to the individual because if you put a person who's successful in another place, they will be successful in that other place. But if you put someone who has unsuccessful tendencies and are and is not a person who has those core values, then no matter where you put them, they'll still exemplify their core beliefs and still not be willing to progress as a society and pursue innovation. So before, just on that aside, I just wanted to mention that it truly comes down to the individual and it's been demonstrated not only within social media but within other spaces.

SPEAKER_01:

Now, time on that. It's so interesting because you are you touched a point which I think haven't been touched for quite a very long time, which is that if you carry water from a pot that was leaking and put it on another pot that was leaking, the water will continue to leak. And you put it on another pot that is leaking, it will continue to leak. And by the time you have put it on the feed the pot, it will it might have gotten finished. But if you put it, you take the same water, put it on a pot that doesn't have any hole, you put it on the same pot that doesn't have is the same, it's the same amount of water, it's the same amount of water, and you will end up having the same amount of water. What does that mean? If you are not active where you are, even if you are taken to a place where you think there are all the opportunities there, you will still not have those opportunities. But if you are active where you are and there are no opportunities already, you have wired up yourself in such a way that you are prepared because proper preparation prevents poor performance. And actually, there is nothing like luck, it's when preparation meets an opportunity. So to but trace on your point, Alpha, which I think it was a very good point, is that we must be prepared every time so that even if we're facing challenges in quests, wherever we are, when opportunity presents itself anytime, anywhere, we will be ready. And therefore, if somebody is complaining, the first question should be, What are you doing? And you know the answer will be I've done everything, and then no, that's already failure. You've done, you cannot do everything. So, this is what I'm doing, and I'm hoping that one day I will have an opportunity where I will utilize this, and I will keep doing it as I also look around on what I can be able to do. I thought to put trace on that because it's a very practical aspect. It's like now everybody says I want to fall bush. Fine, there's nothing wrong, you can fall forest, bush, desert, you can desert mountain. Yeah, but the question always that we don't ask is to do what? Then the question the next will be it is better at there. No, there are also people living there, right? So, what are you going to go and displace the people there with to show that you are more important there and you are bringing something unique that then you can have the opportunities that have been existing there and they were unable to do? I remember anywhere where there is something people are unable to do is because of a lack of skill. So, what is the skill you are presenting? Now they say, Well, I just want to get out of where I am, which is the most flimsy answer I ever hear. Anyway, Apu, I think we are on fire today, right?

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah, yeah. I think this um episode has really it's been very thought-provoking for a lot of individuals, and we we love to see it. So let's uh tune in.

SPEAKER_01:

I think Janet said, Amen. Please keep reading.

SPEAKER_00:

I think uh when barnes says, No weapon that is formed against you will prosper, and you will condemn any tongue that rises against you in judgment. Amen.

SPEAKER_01:

Amen, amen. Thank you very much. Our brother Barnis, and then Janet said something.

SPEAKER_00:

She they say absolutely giving up is tragic. Yes, it's okay to have setbacks, but it is not okay to give up. Keep on pushing and keep on persevering. Perfect, and then Jose Joseph Robbie says informational tools, i.e., social media, apply rightfully, is the quote unquote intercontinental ballistic missile. I love that. This is figuratively, and for winning today's developmental wars, you guys are launching fig figurative figurative missiles.

SPEAKER_01:

But it's true. The reality is what Jose is saying is very true. To be very honest, the opportunities that come with sitting in one place and bringing people from across the continent and the world to discuss it's what has not existed just 20 years ago, right? But the question then is are we utilizing it for good or for bad? Which I think that's why we always come back to is social media breaking or making. And and I think he brought up a very nice point, and I love the humor in it.

SPEAKER_00:

And then Janet says they say, remind me of when Jesus gave three men coins, one person buried his. Yes, they also say great points. We also appreciate your points as well, keeping this flowing. And Peter says, whenever preparation meets opportunity, success is inevitable.

SPEAKER_01:

Absolutely, that's absolutely uh correct, and that's true. So as we run up, what says you?

SPEAKER_00:

But before we round up, I'd like to finish my point regarding the perils of giving up. And I believe that a lot of the time individuals feel stuck, and that's everybody feels stuck at some time, but we must be able to examine all our options and not give up. Although it's easier said than done, we must realize that giving up, we we like you simply there are always going to be other options, and we must be able to find resilience and hope within the face of adversity. And although it may be difficult, it may be a long, tedious journey, but the implications of giving up versus the implications of being resilient, having integrity, pushing through perseverance, these are all things that will help you become a stronger, well-rounded individual and leader in the future. Because those who are able to connect with people, those who are able to storytell and tell their experiences, or those who have experienced challenges and setbacks. But everybody experiences this. But what will set you apart will be your ability to turn them into opportunities. And that is where the principle of innovative volunteerism comes into play. Because the concept understands and recognizes that everybody has their own different contexts and has their own unique challenges. But what can bring us together is our collective community vision for a more sustainable, cleaner, more equitable, and just future. And for us to do that, we must leverage those challenges, which may be waste on the ground or the inequity in education and turn that into opportunities, perhaps to be a mentor, to be a community leader. And all these different things come from perseverance. And giving up is not demonstrating perseverance, but pushing through, finding your strength, and revamping the situation are all ways we can demonstrate resilience and contribute positively to societal change.

SPEAKER_01:

What a moving, amazing, well-worded punch to run up Apu. And I think I will build on that, which is on the point of you cannot be able to move forward without building resilience. Resilience is not given, it's not an injection, a vaccine that is given, it is learned through failing. Resilience is built out of adversity. And what is adversity? In adversity, it's when actually things are not going right, but in that adversity, you learn, and you learn and develop the ability to be able to resist resilience, resisting adversity, resisting things that could be able to collapse you, being having that gravity has to rise back to normal, to never fall down and remain there. And this is I'm giving this definition, not like the one on science, but the ability for you to rise back even when you fall down, the ability of you to see challenges as disguise opportunities, to know that even if it happens, that's okay, it's temporal because the reality is that everything in life is temporal. If you fail today, you can succeed tomorrow, and you can be failing, failing, failing, just one chance you can recover by all the years that you have felt, and that is how it is. You're applying for opportunities, applying for opportunities, one thousand, and then one just comes up and changes the whole equation. And I think I will use this African proof that by crawling, a child learns to stand. That child who crawls every time he or she is crawling, falling, having those bruises becomes stronger and becomes more powerful through that process of falling and getting up and having bruises, and that is resilience. And so when you see somebody who has struggled, who have felt, who have suffered, that human being is actually one of the best prepared human beings that do exist. So we should never ignore and throw away the lessons we learn in adverse situations, in difficult situations, in challenges, thinking that they're meaningless. They're actually the best school that you will never actually get it in four walls of a classroom. And it is in those experiences that you build resilience, and with resilience, you can overcome anything, especially when you add a dose of passion, and more importantly, rejuvenate your mind by seeing yourself already doing what you have in distance to do and putting effort to achieve it. That is how it should be, and that is how it must be. And so, as they say in Galatians chapter 6, verse 9, which I brought it up earlier, that let us not become wary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. What does this mean? It means we must be able to stay focused, apply our effort, but change our minds because mindset change is not a slogan, and it will never be. It is the foundation of a new you. So anybody who wants to change must start from reimagining what I've been doing wrong, what have I not been doing right? How can I become kind? How can I become empathetic? That when I see a grandmother falling down, I rush to hold her to stand up rather than taking a video because I just want to train on TikTok. And if we can be able to do this, then in no time from now, just a few months from now, I can tell you, we'll start to see a change person, a change people, whereby you rise only with one conviction, which is the miracle you are waiting for is actually inside you. All you need is to unleash it. And when you unleash it, transformation starts. And where does transformation start? It starts within. You and what will happen? The harvest will be plentiful. As Matthew 9:37 says, the harvest is plentiful, but the workers are few. Why are they few? Because we are not practicing discipline, kindness, empathy, and more importantly, discipline. Until then, guys, it was a pleasure, and we will catch up next time.

SPEAKER_00:

Thank you guys for watching and enjoy your new month. Have a great day, everybody.

SPEAKER_01:

Absolutely. Bye bye.

Contributor

Danielle Afumbom Munang

Host